So, I spent practically the whole of Christmas eve in bed and I expected that this would be the case for the rest of Christmas. When I mentioned this on Facebook, some friends thought it was a great idea. I guess it could be a restful and even luxurious way to spend the holidays, but, really, only if it’s how you choose to spend the time. I was in bed because I couldn’t quite face the world. I felt sad and lonely and isolated. 

I know many people feel alone during Christmas and all the sharing of festive posts and pics on Facebook can make it worse. You don’t exactly begrudge your friends and acquaintances for having a good time, but, somehow, when you’re depressed (or when I’m depressed), those who share holiday or festive pictures always seem smug and gloating. Truly, I know they aren’t (mostly, anyway) and it’s me and my frame of mind, not them, that’s the problem. I’ve just learnt to avoid Facebook when I’m feeling down.

joininAnyway, although there were those who didn’t quite get that my Facebook post about spending Xmas in bed was a kind of plea for help (maybe even attention and company), there were those who empathised. My Fb friend Harriet Trafford told me about #joinin [left] on Twitter and this initiative was actually what got me out of bed last night. It’s why I cooked lunch today (Christmas day) and why I’m now sitting at my dining table writing this post and not lying in bed covered in crumbs from my ham sandwich.

I am amazed that something as simple as #joinin could make such a huge difference to the way I feel. I think of everyone this must be helping and I am so grateful that it exists. Thank you, Sarah Millican; thank you, Harriet; thank you everyone joining in. Happy Christmas!


2 thoughts on “#joinin

  1. I do so feel for you, Daphne, and know that because of all the emphasis on ‘family Christmas’ such a sense of being alone and effectively abandoned must be both awful and conducive to a deepening depression. I’m not one for birthdays/religious feasts (arbitrary dates as they always are) and could quite happily dispense with them — especially when they lead to negative feelings of guilt, lack or loss which the so-called Christmas spirit compounds when we’re not personally sharing in it.

    Which is why Sarah Millican’s #joinin initiative is fantastic. I have great respect for her as a stand-up comedian (incidentally, I understand she is currently the UK’s highest paid female comic) and now even greater respect for her as a person, using her celebrity in such a positive and caring way. If she can help effect change while reaching out to individuals around the world then I can think of no better pay back by a talented yet privileged person.

    Thinking of you, Daphne, and though I know it’s of limited help I hope that combined with any other well-wishers out there the effect will be to show you are not forgotten.


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